Men in Church? Why Bother? | The Man Coach

We are facing an epidemic in the U.S. today, and that epidemic is men missing from our churches on Sunday morning. If men are the head of the household, what example are we setting across the board with our habits and actions?

I called my buddy Scott Haulter, pastor of Catalyst Church in Greensboro, N.C. and this is what he had to say. This is definitely some food for thought as we plan our Sunday-and everyday.

-The Man Coach


Why aren't more men in church?

Men in church; this seems very dreamy. It doesn’t happen these days. Here are some statistics that make me want to fight.

The typical U.S. Congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61% female, 39% male. This gender gap shows up in all age categories.
[1] On any given Sunday, there are 13 million more adult women than men in America’s churches.
[2] This Sunday almost 25 percent of married, churchgoing women will worship without their husbands.
[3] Midweek activities often draw 70 to 80 percent female participants.

Why does this happen? I think there quite a few reasons. Churches are set up for women. There is more worship than preaching. The preaching is weak, very emotional and often doesn’t make a stand.  There is also the design of church services. Most men learn kinetically; by doing, where as most women learn by hearing.

You see, we men don’t like to admit that we are afraid we are not good enough. We are not strong enough, we are not MAN enough to lead our family, to lead other men. But let me tell you a little secret . . . we all feel inadequate.  Think of who is the most MANLY man you know. He struggles. You struggle, I struggle. But struggling doesn’t mean we just give up and make the women lead our family, our church, or our society.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not against women. I was raised with 2 brothers by a single mom. I respect and love women, and because of that I know that they don’t want to have to lead. They don’t want to deal with all of the hard issues. Heck, neither do I. But as a loving father and husband, I know I want my wife and kids to be protected, to be loved, to be wanted.

Men, it is time to put on your BIG BOY pants and strap in and make it happen. The exciting thing is, you don’t have to do it alone. Jesus wants you to follow him. Jesus will deal with all of the tough issues. Actually, He already has, if we just read and act on what we read in scripture.

I started a church 6 years ago and I was head strong and on fire when I started Catalyst Church. But 5 years in, it is a grind. One day when I was walking my dogs and praying, I finally admitted to God I was NOT a good leader. I asked for help in leading my family, leading the church He gave me, and to lead myself.

Here was the hard part for me. I actually shut my mouth and gave the Father some room to talk, and He did!!!  Here is what Jesus said to me (not audibly but that would have been cool. God has Morgan Freeman’s voice in my head), you don’t have to lead. I will lead, can you follow me?

That was when I realized if I could shut my mouth long enough and just listen, Jesus was leading Catalyst Church, my family, and me (when I let Him).

Won’t you do the same? Shut your pie hole and listen. God will speak!!!  Will you listen and then act?

Scott Haulter

The Man Coach supports a Christian based worldview and agree with Scott 100%. Men across the U.S. need to step up and take a leadership role in and out of the home! This week, be sure to attend the church of your choice. If you need to talk about it, we are here.